Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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