covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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