so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
