I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
