HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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