She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
