a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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