We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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