Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
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