If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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