office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Randomize
