so that wasnt chicken after all
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
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