Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Buhtt sex?
i will never coherently bang her
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
