hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
youre lurking in front of me
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
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