That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
