I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
my shit smells like andre
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
