you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
