he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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