Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
im calling her cock vulture from now on
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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