what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
