Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
There's always time for handjobs
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Randomize
