It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Randomize