my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
What happened to fro yo and sex?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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