I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
