Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
