Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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