GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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