dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
