im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
