After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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