What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
