when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize