Just fell off a train. Bad.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
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i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
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