Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
