I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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