I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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