No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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