Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
