she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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