Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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