i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
