Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize