It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
We got so high we made milksteak
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
