Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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