fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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