I just threw up on my dentist
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize