I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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