we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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