And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
