That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize