You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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